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staff training

Just as the title states, crap that makes no sense what-so-ever goes here (i.e. spam).

staff training

Postby DAGGERZ on Fri Mar 13, 2009 12:00 pm

Staff Warning - Swearing at Work

Dear Employees

It has been brought to management's attention that some individuals throughout the company have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with their colleagues.

Due to complaints received from some employees who may be easily offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated.

We do, however, realise the critical importance of being able to accurately express your feelings when communicating with colleagues.

Therefore, a list of New and Innovative 'TRY SAYING' phrases have been provided so that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner.
1.
Try Saying:
I think you could do with more training
Instead Of:
You don't have a f***ing clue, do you?

2.
Try Saying:
She's an aggressive go-getter.
Instead Of:
She's a f***ing power-crazy b*tch

3.
Try Saying:
Perhaps I can work late
Instead Of:
And when the f*** do you expect me to do this?

4.
Try Saying:
I'm certain that isn't feasible
Instead Of:
F*** off a*se- hole

5.
Try Saying:
Really?
Instead Of:
Well f*** me backwards with a telegraph pole

6.
Try Saying:
Perhaps you should check with...
Instead Of:
Tell someone who gives a f***.

7.
Try Saying:
I wasn't involved in the project.
Instead Of:
Not my f***ing problem.

8.
Try Saying:
That's interesting.
Instead Of:
What the f***?

9.
Try Saying:
I'm not sure this can be implemented within the given timescale.
Instead Of:
No f***ing chance mate.

10.
Try Saying:
It will be tight, but I'll try to schedule it in
Instead Of:
Why the f*** didn't you tell me that yesterday?

11.
Try Saying:
He's not familiar with the issues
Instead Of:
He's got his head up his f***ing a*se.

12.
Try Saying:
Excuse me, sir?
Instead Of:
Oi, f*** face..

13.
Try Saying:
Of course, I was only going to be at home anyway
Instead Of:
Yeah, who needs f***ing holidays anyway.

14.
Try Saying:
I don't think it was supposed to turn out like that
Instead Of:
I see the f**k up fairy has visited again then

15
Try Saying:
Sorry - I didn't quite catch that
Instead Of:
What the f**k are you wittering on about this time ?

16
Try Saying
Do you really think so ?
Instead Of:
No sh*t Sherlock

17
Try Saying:
Do you think that's appropriate work wear for the office ?
Instead Of
Have you seen the f**king state of that ?

18
Try Saying:
There is a cleaner required in the lavatories
Instead Of:
I'd give that a while

19
Try Saying:
He's / she's quite attractive
Instead Of:
I'd do it

20
Try Saying:
He does have a tendency to procrastinate
Instead Of:
He's so f**king boring, I am losing the will to live

21
Try Saying:
It's so nice to be in a busy office environment
Instead Of:
Why don't you all just shut the f**k up
The room went that way ->>>>
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Re: staff training

Postby Chosen One on Fri Mar 13, 2009 1:16 pm

hahaahaha!!!
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Re: staff training

Postby Solid Rock on Sat Mar 14, 2009 5:31 am

So Daggz, this anything you plan to folow, in the interest of a more friendly office enviroment here at SXR?
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Re: staff training

Postby DAGGERZ on Sat Mar 14, 2009 10:57 am

Solid Rock wrote:So Daggz, this anything you plan to folow, in the interest of a more friendly office enviroment here at SXR?


is it fuck
The room went that way ->>>>
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Re: staff training

Postby Solid Rock on Sat Mar 14, 2009 11:26 am

DAGGERZ wrote:
Solid Rock wrote:So Daggz, this anything you plan to folow, in the interest of a more friendly office enviroment here at SXR?


is it fuck


No, didnt really think so either :P.
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Re: staff training

Postby Pantho on Sat Mar 14, 2009 11:54 am

DAGGERZ wrote:
Solid Rock wrote:So Daggz, this anything you plan to folow, in the interest of a more friendly office enviroment here at SXR?


is it fuck


You mean:

Not at the moment,
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Re: staff training

Postby DAGGERZ on Sat Mar 14, 2009 11:56 am

well if i get all pleasent, your start wondering if its the real daggerz
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Re: staff training

Postby Solid Rock on Sat Mar 14, 2009 4:08 pm

DAGGERZ wrote:well if i get all pleasent, your start wondering if its the real daggerz


Bodysnatchers :P.
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